Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

The sadness was still there.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

What is your secret to glowing skin?

Be who you already are.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

It’s here now, writing to you.

What does it mean when someone leaves something in your house, your room to be exact, and when you tell them, they say they left it there on purpose?

It’s still here.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Are miracles real or do they just have natural explanations?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

You are like me, then.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

In your opinion, what is the worst rock band in history and why do you think they gained a large following?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

I had run out of hope.

What happens if someone fills up their car at the pump but leaves without paying? How is this situation typically handled?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

What happened to the American Russell Bentley from Texas that was fighting for the pro-Russian commies?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Why cant I breathe when I sleep on my back, I can breathe if im on my side or stomach but I feel uncomfortable since either my neck is twisted or my back is in pain, im physically healthy and my surroundings are clean so whats the problem?

I was tired of trying and failing.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

4.5 billion years ago, Jupiter was 2.5 times its current size, scientists discover. - Stewartville Star

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

And the sadness?

If you believe in God, do you think God can save you from cancer?

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

I was tired of fighting.